With that said, my exhaustion may be playing a role in my immediate and visceral reaction to a story Andrew Sullivan referenced and linked to titled, "Just Because He Breathes: Learning to Truly Love Our Gay Son".
I am horrified, devastated, and filled with a seething rage. And the worst part is I have no idea how to sort these feelings or who or what to be most angry with. All I seem to be able to do is cry, which has caused my sunscreen to melt into my eyes, causing them to burn like crazy, making it almost impossible to see, and compounding my misery and fury.
I'd suggest going over to Andrew's first and reading his intro and then following his embedded link to the full story over at the Huffington Post since I may be the last person from whom you would want to get an opinion right now since I am tired, cranky, and have absolutely nothing to good to say about the brand of Christianity that hates in the name of god.
I knew the story would not end well after reading the first third of the article. In fact I became physically sick to my stomach. I knew where the story was headed when mom, Linda Robertson, described how she and her husband, good Christians, reacted after they learned their son Ryan was gay:
We said all the things that we thought loving Christian parents who believed the Bible, the Word of God, should say:
We love you. We will always love you. And this is hard. Really hard. But we know what God says about this, so you are going to have to make some really difficult choices.
We love you. We couldn't love you more. But there are other men who have faced this same struggle, and God has worked in them to change their desires. We'll get you their books; you can listen to their testimonies. And we will trust God with this.
We love you. We are so glad you are our son. But you are young, and your sexual orientation is still developing. The feelings you've had for other guys don't make you gay. So please don't tell anyone that you are gay. You don't know who you are yet. Your identity is not that you are gay; it is that you are a child of God.
We love you. Nothing will change that. But if you are going to follow Jesus, holiness is your only option. You are going to have to choose to follow Jesus, no matter what. And since you know what the Bible says, and since you want to follow God, embracing your sexuality is not an option.I am afraid to say too much more right now. I am so tired and upset and well ... most of you know how I feel about so-called "good Christians" who use twisted, ancient bible passages to justify their rejection of gay people --- even if one of them happens to be their child.
I am so conflicted. I feel such sadness for these parents and I do believe they loved their son (just not for who he was), but I am also furious with them too. Their ignorance and efforts to be "loving Christian parents who believed the Bible" literally tortured and ultimately killed him. But on the other hand, they will live the rest of their lives buried in guilt and regret. So in the end, I go back to having nothing but pure contempt and disdain for the kind of religion that dupes the gullible into believing that rejecting your gay kid because of who he or she is equals being a loving Christian parent in the eyes of god.