Catholic Church Fires Gay Music Director

(Kansas City, Missouri) Joseph Nadeau prayed for storms when he was an altar boy, hoping the lights would go out and he'd be picked to play the church's creaking organ to celebrate Holy Mass. Now in his mid-thirties, Nadeau's bold spiritual arrangements have brought dozens of parishioners to his suburban parish in Roeland Park, Kan.

But last Sunday, Nadeau ended his last Mass at St. Agnes Catholic Church with a wrenching solo on "God Help the Outcasts." It was his other life, as the artistic director of one of the nation's largest gay male choirs, that ultimately cost him his job.

"I've known I was gay since I was 15 or 16," said the soft-spoken Nadeau at his brick home in Kansas City. "My parish priest told me just follow your heart and you can't go wrong. I can't think of doing anything else."

The Roman Catholic Church views homosexual acts as "intrinsically disordered," and in November held that priests who support "so-called gay culture" cannot be ordained. While Vatican teachings also instruct that gays and lesbians should be treated with compassion, church employees are expected to live in accordance with Catholic doctrine.

The church's decision to let Nadeau's contract lapse, however, comes at a time when the role of homosexuals is causing debates inside churches nationwide - though the bulk of those conversations never go public.

In January, St. Agnes Catholic Church hierarchy summoned Nadeau into a closed-door meeting, he said. Pastor Gary Appelgate told Nadeau that to continue as music director, he needed to resign from Kansas City's Heartland Men's Chorus, take a vow of celibacy and acknowledge that homosexuality was a disorder, Nadeau said.

So let me get this straight. This church is firing a man because he is gay and refuses to take a vow of celibacy and acknowledge that homosexuality is a disorder? Never mind that he gave 8 years of his life in dedicated service to this church. Never mind that there is not even a mention of dissatisfaction with his work. Never mind that his biggest sin was to accept what he could not change.

I just want to know one thing, why didn’t the Catholic Church feel the need to cleanse itself of the pedophile priests or those who enabled them? Why did it look the other way when priests who had taken the vow of celibacy broke them, and in a most heinous way? Why are gays and lesbians “intrinsically disordered”, but priests who rape children are not? Why was there a place in the Catholic Church for these rapists and their enablers for so many decades, but no place for gays now?

I just do not understand how anyone can take the Catholic Church seriously anymore. This is an institution that has so lost its way. Again I have to ask: how can anyone walk through the doors of an institution that for decades allowed and facilitated the sexual abuse of its most vulnerable, but still thinks it holds enough moral high ground to tell us that gays are evil?

Hat tip to Pam

"It is not the task of our government and elected representatives to enshrine in our laws the religious point of view of any one faith," the group wrote in a recent letter to federal lawmakers. "Rather, our government should dedicate itself to protecting the rights of all citizens and all faiths."

Religious leaders who oppose ammending
the U.S. Constitution to ban gay marriage.

It feels as though we only hear the Dobson, Robertson, Falwell crowd anymore, so it is easy to forget that there does exist a more reasonable and loving voice out there and thankfully it is getting louder.

Hat tip to Andrew Sullivan.

These Quacks Should Do Hard Time

These people are lower than pond scum! I cannot even imagine the pain and devastation they leave in their wake.

Oh George, What Have You Done?

I am melancholy. I am going through our home of the past decade and boxing up the memories from an era that has ended for my husband and me. Our children are either in college or about to go to college and this once noisy and vibrant house now feels eerily silent and hollow, ready to bid us good bye and usher in a new family to house and shelter the way it once did us.

Going through long forgotten contents of cabinets and closets and finding evidence that indeed the past 10 years did happen, albeit with lightening speed (at least from where I stand right now), I have been taken on a nostalgic journey of memories, both happy and sad. As I take down each picture I quickly flash to that point in time and relive the event.

It is wonderful being able to recapture the hopes, dreams, and true joy my husband and I experienced during those past 10 years with our family. We truly felt we had the world by the tail. There were days that we would look at each other and ask: How did we get so lucky? We marveled at having 3 wonderful, perfect children and so much for which to be grateful. Life was truly wonderful. And we knew that our children were so blessed to be citizens in this great country of so much opportunity and prosperity. The sky really was their only limit.

But alas reality inevitably comes creeping in via a television or a quick peek at the internet and I am jerked back to the reality that is today. I am reminded that 5 ½ years ago this country swore in a man named George Bush. A man who campaigned as the guy you’d love to have as a neighbor. The guy you’d invite over for a bar-b-que and a beer. 5 ½ years ago this country was hopeful and innocent. 5 ½ years ago our three children had reasons to believe that life would treat them as well as it had their parents. 5 ½ years ago our three children had equal opportunities limited only by how hard they each strived to reach their goals. 5 ½ years ago I thought each of our three children had the option to have families that they too could raise and enjoy and then nostalgically look back on one day with happy memories.

I realize that I am in a bit of a funk right now, but I cannot help feeling that George W. Bush did to the dreams I had for my children what I just did an hour ago to a glass figurine that I dropped and watched shatter. He has shattered the peace this country had been enjoying by taking us into a war we should not be fighting. He has shattered the respect and good will that many countries felt toward us. He has even shattered the unity that this country felt after the horrible attack on 9/11. He has shattered the freedom to disagree. He has shattered the freedom to be different and not be judged negatively and punitively for it. He has shattered the hopes of a whole segment of our society to be treated equally and with dignity. And in the eyes of this mother, he has committed the unforgivable sin of shattering the hopes and dreams we had for one of our children by singling him out as different, imperfect, and a target for scorn and inferior status.

George, I dream of a day when you are just a bad memory. I dream of the day when this country can start to heal from the damage you have done. And I dream of the day when someone who is truly a great and courageous leader comes along and gives back to my son what you stole from him, the right to be treated the way your 2 daughters will be treated. I cannot wait to say good bye to you George Bush. I just wish it was today and not in 2 years. I am saying good bye to one era of my life today George, sadly it is not the one I want to say good bye to.

Posting will be light...

Posting will be light for about the next 3 weeks because of our impending move the beginning of June. Unfortunately the things over which to seethe haven't slowed down a bit. There is so much nonsense going on that I may have to get on to vent just for sanity and health reasons.

I will gladly post letters and personal stories related to GLBT issues. Now would be a great time to share your frustrations, hopes, disappointments, or whatever.

Oh Jack, Keep On Talking

Jack Cafferty - Sexiest Man On Television. And the grumpier he gets, the more I love him! It is so refreshing to see someone with some backbone speaking the truth. Keep on talking Jack --- Pretty Please.

Sanctity, Schmanctity – Shut Your Mouth Congressman Sherwood

There are so many things that repulse me about this group of Republicans presently in office that it is hard to rank what stinks most. But if I had to pick one thing, it would be the hypocrisy with a little sanctimony sprinkled in for good measure that has been the mainstay of this party for the past 5 ½ years. This Family Values crowd has got the buzz words down pat, but little else.

As I have harped on ad nauseam, Senator Frist is going to reintroduce the Federal Marriage Amendment next month because, as you know, the sanctity of marriage is under attack by those evil homos and we need the GOP to rescue it. And Senator Frist has plenty of little Christian Soldiers ready and willing to step up on their little pedestals and beat on their chests with pious fervor and tell us how they are going to protect your marriage and mine by backing this piece of do-nothing-but-excite-the-bigots-and-hopefully-boost-their-poll-numbers legislation.

Well this little post is dedicated to the Sanctimonious-GOP-Hypocrite of the month: Congressman Don Sherwood R-PA. Congressman Don Sherwood is seeking his fifth two-year term for the 10th Congressional District and has just won the Republican primary. Congressman Sherwood has been married for 33 years and has 3 daughters. Congressman Sherwood also supports the Federal Marriage Amendment.

So why am I picking on poor little ole Don since it certainly appears that his background makes him a good spokesperson for marriage and family values? Well it might have something to do with this:

Police responded to the Washington, D.C., apartment of U.S. Rep. Don Sherwood seven months ago after a woman who was visiting called 911 and reported he choked her.

Sherwood, R-Tunkhannock, says he was falsely accused. He pointed to a police report that stated the woman backed off the claim. He also said he’s the victim of a political smear.

No one has been charged in what the police termed a domestic incident.

“Both parties have left out significant information or are not willing to discuss in detail what actually happened,” Washington Metropolitan Police stated in the incident report.

Cynthia Ore, 29, of Rockville, Md. locked herself in a bathroom and called 911 from her cell phone on the afternoon of Sept. 15, saying Sherwood “choked her for no apparent reason” while giving her a backrub in his apartment on D Street, according to a police report.

Sherwood, 64, told police he was giving Ore a backrub when she “jumped up” and ran to the bathroom, the report stated.

Or this:

Ore said she met Sherwood at a Young Republicans meeting in 1999 and has had an ongoing relationship with him. Sherwood would not get into specifics about the relationship.

Well let me tell you something Congressman Sherwood, your hypocrisy is mind boggling and disgusting. Don’t you ever open your mouth and tell us about the sanctity of marriage again buddy! No, I take that back, yes do open your mouth and apologize for being such a low-life hypocrite and then announce you are dropping out of the race for your seat because you love this country and you know it doesn’t need another scumbag in office. And while you are at it, apologize to all of the gays and lesbians you have smeared while cuddling with your 20-something mistress when you weren’t piously holding yourself up as an example of integrity and morality. I don’t think adultery with a girl young enough to be one of your daughters and choking lovers fall under the Family Values you and your fellow GOPers so dearly love to shove down our throats.

And to those who voted for this man in the primaries. I hope you didn’t vote with Family Values as your top priority because if you did, you’ve been had. This guy doesn’t deserve to pick up your trash let alone tell the country how to protect the Sanctity of Marriage or Family Values.


Hat tip to AMERICAblog for keeping this out in the open where it belongs!

We Are Home

We are back. It was a wonderful trip and a great break. My face actually hurts, I smiled so much.

For the most part my husband and I avoided even having the television on during the little bit of time we were in the hotel. We just wanted to focus on our son and his accomplishments and take a break from all news. Unfortunately, my husband did turn on the television once to see who won the Phoenix Suns/ Los Angeles Clippers game and in his search for a score he accidentally landed on CNN just in time for me to hear this:

I don't really believe those polls. I travel around the country. I see people, I see their responses to my husband. I see their response to me.

And this:

As I travel around the United States, I see a lot of appreciation for him. A lot of people come up to me and say, 'Stay the course'.

I was in the bathroom brushing my teeth and I actually gagged. It was Laura Bush. I could not believe what I was hearing. She is as insulated and clueless as her husband. I don’t know why this got to me so much, but it did. How could these people be so out-of-touch?

Pitiful!

Hat tip and big thanks to Mu at Running Scared for having the same reaction I did. I don’t feel so alone now.

I Really Am Leaving, But ...

USA Today letters to the editor: Seems there are plenty of people not happy with Mary Cheney.

Off To See My Son Graduate

I am leaving today to go watch my oldest son graduate from college. He is graduating at the top of his class with a dual degree and he did it all in three years. Am I bragging? You bet. He is part of the generation that is going to make this country great again.

I could not ask for a better Mother's Day Gift than my three children.

I will be back in a few days...

Dear Senator Frist - My Second Plea For Sanity

Take a look at these 3 babies. These are pictures of my 3 precious children when they were babies. They are now in their teens and early twenties and they are all turning out to be amazing people. I have a lot of hope that they will be part of the generation that makes this country great again. They will be part of the generation that will have to dig this country out of the big black hole in which you and this GOP administration have buried us, and they certainly have their work cut out for them. But they give me hope that I have not had for a very long time.

I was wondering though, in your darkest hours (of which I’m sure you’ve had many) do you think about the terrible missteps that you and your fellow GOP comrades and this administration have taken? Do you think about the things you could have and probably should have done differently? Do you have any regrets? Do you worry about this country at all or is it all about saving your sinking poll numbers and dying political careers?

The reason I ask is that I got to thinking about your career in particular and I could not help remembering that shameful day that you went to the floor of the Senate and argued that Terri Schiavo was not in a persistent vegetative state. I was flabbergasted that you would sacrifice your good reputation as a Heart Surgeon for such an obvious political ploy. I was amazed that you could do something so transparent and ridiculous like making a diagnosis simply by viewing an amateur video tape for about an hour in your office. That really took courage, especially since other doctors who were actually neurologists and not heart surgeons like you, had painstakingly examined her in person over a much longer period and had pretty much come to the opposite conclusion you did. How did it make you feel to have stepped into the middle of a family’s personal tragedy and make an already painful situation much worse. How did it make you feel to invade the privacy of this family in such a horrible way? Do you have any regrets? Would you do anything differently if you could do it all over again?

The reason I ask is that I am watching you get ready to do it all over again only this time, on a much bigger scale. Instead of exacerbating one family’s pain you are about to hurt thousands and thousands of families. My family will be one of them. In June you are going to reintroduce the Federal Marriage Amendment again, which will mark one of my beautiful children as a second class citizen unable to enjoy the same rights, protections, and dignity that your children will enjoy and take for granted. You are about to take our beautiful constitution which has always been about protecting the rights of all Americans and turn it into a document that discriminates against a huge segment of our population. You are about to destroy the very principles that made this country great. You are about to make a fool of yourself again.

Senator Frist, save yourself from making another huge and embarrassing mistake. Don’t single out one of my beautiful children and make him an outcast. Spare my family and thousands like mine the pain and agony of yet another transparent political ploy that has nothing to do with solving this country’s major problems. Please sir, I beg you, leave my family and my child alone. Treat my child the same way you treat your own children. Don’t strip away my child’s dignity. This will not solve the huge problems this country is now facing, it will only confirm in most people’s minds what they already suspect, that you are a cheap political opportunist who will do whatever it takes to save his career, the country be damned.

Yup It’s Either A Cave Or A Closet

Well someone else is shocked at Mary Cheney’s complete cluelessness:

I'm sorry, but this is pathetic:

KING: On domestics -- what's the rule -- what's the law in Virginia?

CHENEY: Actually I'm not sure what the law is in Virginia. I should know that.

KING: Does your partner have -- if you're in the hospital, god forbid, does your partner have rights?

CHENEY: My partner and I have living wills, regular wills, powers of attorney, everything that quite honestly any couple married or not should have.

I have no personal issues with Mary Cheney. But, really. She lives in a state which has gone through a wrenching debate these past few years over the rights of gay couples, and has passed the most draconian law imaginable designed to curtail and destroy all the legal documents she says she has. And she is utterly unaware of this debate, let alone attempting to do something about it. Sad.

I guess I am not the only one asking:

Good God girl, are you really that insulated and removed from the reality that your gay and lesbian brethren face everyday?

I guess the answer is yes if your daddy is the Vice President of the United States. Pathetic!

Hat tip to Andrew

Dear Mary Cheney

I have written rather angry letters to both your mom and your dad, but I just couldn’t bring myself to write you. I simply did not think I had any beef with you. And as a mom who has a gay child, I only felt sadness for you. I truly didn’t harbor the intense anger at you that many in the GLBT community do. I sincerely believed you unselfishly put your loyalty for your parents and their political ambitions before your own personal happiness. That broke my heart. It should have been your parents sacrificing for you, not the other way around. I believed then as I do now that you deserve so much more from your parents.

But today I am really really angry with you. NO wait, I AM SEETHING. I just got done reading something that made my blood boil and made me realize that you do not deserve any sympathy from me. I now think you deserve every single bit of the anger and contempt the GLBT community has aimed at you and then some.

How in heaven’s name could you say with any kind of straight face that:

John Kerry didn't 'out me', nor did he offend or attack me by calling me a lesbian. It wasn't a secret that I was gay, and I certainly couldn't be offended by the truth,'' she writes. ``What was offensive was that he was obviously trying to use me and my sexual orientation for his own political gain. (emphasis mine)

Where have you been for the last 6 years? Are you deaf, dumb, and blind????? You thought John Kerry was using you for political gain because he dared to state an already known fact: that you are a lesbian? You think he was guilty of sleazy politics? You found his mentioning your sexuality offensive? Are you for real? Have you no idea how unbelievably idiotic you sound even saying that stuff? You really must be in a closet, an extremely sound proof one, cut off from all televisions, newspapers, computers (and oxygen, judging from that brain dead statement) for the past 6 years. If you found John Kerry’s true statement offensive then what the hell do you think your father’s administration has been doing for the past 6 years? Do you find gay baiting, homophobia, hate, cruel slurs, misinformation, conflation of homosexuality with bestiality and pedophilia, the push to enshrine second class citizenship into the constitution, and the obsession with demonizing and marginalizing the GLBT community to be offensive? Because that, Mary, is what your father’s administration has been doing. And that, Mary, is “sleazy” politics.

Good God girl, are you really that insulated and removed from the reality that your gay and lesbian brethren face everyday because of your father’s administration? John Kerry was not offensive and sleazy for mentioning a simple fact about you. Get over yourself. Stop the feigned furor. You obviously are clueless to what real fury is all about. And stop giving your father’s administration a pass for 6 years of horror aimed squarely at gays and lesbians? Your father’s administration knows NO limits on filth and dirty politics. There are no limits on how low they will go in their quest to divide the country and incite hatred and bigotry towards gays if it will buy them a few measly votes.

Your father’s administration has used MY SON, Mary, MY SON to rally the foam-at-the-mouth snake oil Christians who hate gays and lesbians. They hate my son and yes Mary, they hate you too. And your father has used them with his eyes wide open. How does it feel to be unfortunate collateral damage? It makes me want to slap his sneering face, Mary. You may not care, but I do. I care deeply Mary. Because my son will not have the advantage of living the sheltered, insulated life you obviously live. I love my son and I believe he deserves so much better than the crappy world your father’s administration is getting ready to hand to him. And you should have enough self respect to believe that for yourself too.

I think you are calling the wrong people "total slime'' and "sons of a bitches'', Mary. John Kerry and John Edwards are failed candidates. Your father and his boss, the President, are just plain failures.

Hat tip to AMERICAblog
go read what John has to say.

OK Tell Me Something I Don’t Already Know

Years ago my children’s pediatrician, who was a very wise man, told me that when a mother of one of his patients tells him that she knows something is wrong with her child, he listens. Many years of practice had taught him moms know their children so it is wise to be all ears when a mother talks. What prompted this particular conversation was my embarrassment telling him that I knew something was wrong with my baby even though I could not quite put my finger on what it was. And sure enough, the next day my son had chicken pox blooming in full glory all over his body.

So when I read the USA Today article about a team of Swedish researchers and their findings on homosexuality, it was not surprising to me that their studies added more credence to the theory that homosexuality might be an inborn trait as opposed to a lifestyle choice.

I am certainly no scientist, but I am the mother of a gay child and I know my son did not choose to be gay any more than I chose to be straight. So for me the researchers’ findings were comforting but anticlimactic. I will admit though, it is always nice to have what I knew in my gut to be true reaffirmed by something a little more credible than a gut feeling.

This particular study focused on the brains of lesbian women, but this same group of researchers had conducted a similar study of gay men a year ago. Their findings do not definitively prove one way or another that homosexuality is an inborn trait, but their results certainly chisel away at the religious right’s argument that homosexuality is a lifestyle choice. And for me it only strengthens my belief that my son’s destiny to be a gay man was encoded into his genetic makeup long before he was born and there was nothing we could have done to alter that destiny:

Snip:

Homosexuals' brains respond differently from those of straight men and women when exposed to sex hormones, but researchers now say the difference is less pronounced in lesbians than in gay men.

Lesbians' brains reacted somewhat, though not completely, like those of heterosexual men, a team of Swedish researchers said in Tuesday's edition of Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences.

A year ago, the same group reported findings for gay men that showed their brain response to hormones was similar to that of heterosexual women.

In both cases the findings add weight to the idea that homosexuality has a physical basis and is not learned behavior. (emphasis mine)

Snip:

The important thing is to be open to the likely situation that there are biological factors that contribute to sexual orientation," added Witelson, who was not part of the research team. (emphasis mine)

Sadly, this study will be scoffed at and ignored by the Dobson, Robertson, Falwell crowd. These people are terrified of anything that might throw doubt on their rigidly dogmatic contentions that homosexuality is an evil lifestyle choice and not an inborn trait. These people will never ever be open to anything that contradicts their beliefs. True science is their bitter enemy, which is why they either completely ignore these kinds of studies or create their own pseudoscience to back up their beliefs.

For me, one of the most heinous examples of psycho-babble junk science is this piece of nonsense I got from James Dobson’s Focus on the Family website. I painfully read thru this hooey until I got to what I knew was coming: we parents are to blame for our children being gay. Had we followed the good (((((((bristle))))))) doc’s recommendations, we would never have had a gay son:

… (The boy’s father) needs to mirror and affirm his son's maleness. He can play rough-and-tumble games with his son, in ways that are decidedly different from the games he would play with a little girl. He can help his son learn to throw and catch a ball. He can teach him to pound a square wooden peg into a square hole in a pegboard. He can even take his son with him into the shower, where the boy cannot help but notice that Dad has a penis, just like his, only bigger.

Based on my (James Dobson) work with adult homosexuals, I try to avoid the necessity of a long and sometimes painful therapy by encouraging parents, particularly fathers, to affirm their sons' maleness. Parental education, in this area and all others, can prevent a lifetime of unhappiness and a sense of alienation. When boys begin to relate to their fathers, and begin to understand what is exciting, fun and energizing about their fathers, they will learn to accept their own masculinity. They will find a sense of freedom—of power—by being different from their mothers, outgrowing them as they move into a man's world. If parents encourage their sons in these ways, they will help them develop masculine identities and be well on their way to growing up straight. In 15 years, I have spoken with hundreds of homosexual men. I have never met one who said he had a loving, respectful relationship with his father.

This is so appalling that I am at a loss for words. How dare this man tell me and my husband that not only was our son’s homosexuality avoidable, but it’s our fault that he is gay. I simply cannot comprehend that kind of reckless ignorance and cruelty being blithely tossed out there as though it is backed by sound science. I truly have to wonder if James Dobson has a conscience. Spouting this kind of junk science makes him a despicable human being and a very poor excuse for a doctor. I can only imagine the anguish he has caused so many people. And even more incomprehensible to me is that this fraud has the ear of the President of the United States.

Update:

It looks like Pam is reporting that Dobson is hot on the trail to unlocking the keys to the creation of a homosexual:

In Monday's (05/08/06) Focus On The Family broadcast Dobson throws out a new term not even Google has a clinical definition for called "detachment and differentiation." This supposedly describes the process by which a young boy separates from the mother and bonds with the father around ages 2-3. Dobson says homosexuality is "very typically rooted in the failure to accomplish that differentiation." Dobson proceeds to tell listeners and a studio gallery full of Focus Institute students he remembers that pivotal moment at age 2-3 which led to formation of his heterosexuality.

Please go over to Pam’s and read the whole thing.

Dear Lynne Cheney

Can we talk? You know, mother to mother. I hate having to write a letter over the internet when it would be so much easier to have you over to my home for a glass of ice tea and a face to face chat. I have so much I want to ask you. And somehow writing you a letter just does not cut it. But alas, I know you are the Second Lady of the United States married to the second most powerful man in the world and probably way too busy to take time out of your hectic schedule for someone like me. But you know Lynne, you and I share something in common: we are both mothers of gay children. And that Lynne is why I so desperately would love to have an hour of your time. There are so many things with which I need to come to terms and unfortunately, you are the only one that can help me.

I watched Diane Sawyer interview your lesbian daughter, Mary, on Primetime last night. I could not help watching her from the perspective of a mother who also has a gay child. And from that perspective Lynne, I could not help feeling terrible sadness and anguish for your daughter. I saw a young woman speaking in an almost robotic voice, carefully weighing and measuring each word with the seasoned experience of someone who has had years of practice. I saw a young woman who sold her soul so long ago that she expects nothing more from life than the sad existence her father’s homophobic, hateful administration is working hard to enshrine into the constitution. I saw a young woman who has sacrificed everything for a mother and father who should have been the ones sacrificing for her. I saw a young woman who has had to rely on empty words of love from parents whose actions betrayed their real priorities, which did not include her happiness, dignity, or right to equality.

Many in the gay and lesbian community harbor intense anger towards your daughter. As a lesbian and the daughter of two very powerful people, Mary could have made a huge difference in the fight for equality and dignity. She chose to let that opportunity evaporate. And I believe she made that choice out of deference to her parents, which is why I aim all of my seething rage at you, Lynne. As a mother in the position you are in, you could have made a huge difference in the life of not only your daughter, but thousands and thousands of sons and daughters, but you chose power and glory instead. Good Lord Lynne, even Nancy Reagan was finally willing to chuck the rigid, dogmatic GOP policies on stem cell research when someone she loved was personally and negatively affected.

I would sacrifice anything and everything to ensure a better life for my gay son, so it is beyond my comprehension how you could be a part of an administration that is so willing to demonize and rob your daughter of the basic rights everyone else enjoys. As a mother, I simply cannot fathom your role in all of this. Was it a sort of Sophie’s Choice situation, on the one hand, all the power and glory that goes with being Second Lady of the United States, and on the other, the regrettable but necessary sacrifice of your daughter’s happiness?

Did you have any clue that when you tearfully told your daughter, upon learning she was a lesbian, that life would be much harder for her, that you would one day be part of the homophobic administration that was going to bring that prediction to fruition? Does it bother you that you have sat quietly by while your daughter has been used as a sacrificial lamb at the altar of your so called Religious Right base? Does it bother you that you had the power to make a difference and you did nothing? In your quiet moments do you feel any guilt? Do you even see the hypocrisy of being a member of a party that preaches family values, but destroys families like yours and mine? Do you sleep well at night? I know your husband has no problem sleeping.

I have no respect for you Lynne Cheney, not as a mother and not as a Second Lady. You had the chance to make a difference for all of our gay and lesbian children, but you either lacked the courage to lead the fight or your lust for power and prominence took precedence over your own child. There is no defense, the past 5 ½ years speak for themselves. Your administration thinks gays and lesbians should not be parents, well I know plenty of straight people who are poor excuses for parents.

On second thought, maybe that invitation to share some iced tea and a chat was wishful thinking. You don’t even have the courage to stand up for your own child, why did I think you would have the back bone to face the seething mom of one of the people you have damned to a life of second-class citizenship?

Bishop Turns Back on Gay Catholics - No Surprise There…

In today’s Phoenix paper there is an article about a local Catholic priest who took a leave of absence in January. The article discusses a letter that Reverend Chris Carpenter wrote to local newspapers stating that:

(Phoenix) Bishop Thomas Olmsted has turned his back on lesbian, gay, bisexual, and transgender Catholics.

The article continues:

"I refuse to serve as a priest in a church environment that is increasingly sending a false and destructive message that my LGBT brothers and sisters and I are little more than immature, defective sex addicts," said the Rev. Chris Carpenter, former pastor of Christ the King parish in Mesa.

Carpenter was one of nine priests who signed an ecumenical statement of support for gay people in January 2003. Seventeen months later, Olmsted required the signers to revoke their support.

Ok, no disrespect intended, but I just have to ask Father Carpenter what on earth took him so long to see the light? The Catholic Church is kind of like the Republican Party, there is NO room for people like him. The church’s message to gays: You are not welcome, you have never been welcome, and you are only convenient to our Catholic hierarchy as a scapegoat for the horrific pedophile debacle we now find ourselves in. You are objectively disordered and intrinsically evil. And that comes directly from our most holy one in Rome so it is as good as coming straight out of the mouth of God. We just want you to get out. In fact, you can just go to Hell (after all you are going there eventually anyway).

Now the bigger question I have is why would anyone who is gay, priest or not, remain in the Catholic Church? In fact I wonder how anyone (gay or straight) can reconcile within themselves the great hypocrisy that hangs over the Catholic Church like a cloud of putrid toxic smoke. I know I can no longer walk through the doors of an institution that for decades allowed and facilitated the sexual abuse of its most vulnerable, but still thinks it holds enough moral high ground to tell us that gays are evil.

And Father Carpenter, it isn’t going to do a whole lot of good to go after Bishop Olmsted. He is just an unthinking, unfeeling robot following orders. You gotta go to the top like I did. But unfortunately, it probably won’t do you any more good than it did me. You see, we are just fallible little peons who happen to believe that Jesus loved everyone and excluded no one. There is no place in an institution for people, gay or straight, who believe just the opposite.

Actions Speak Louder Than Words Sir

"You're my daughter, and I love you, and I just want you to be happy," – Vice President Cheney’s reaction upon learning his daughter, Mary, is a lesbian.

This is eerily similar to what I told my son when I found out he was gay. The difference, aside from gender of course, is that I meant it when I said it and I prove it everyday through my actions. The Vice President’s words have proven to be quite empty. He is part of an administration that is horrendously homophobic and hateful and has gone out of its way to back it up in actions.

So again Mr. Vice President I must ask: how do you sleep at night?

Hat tip to Andrew Sullivan

Just Looking At Today’s News

I have been a bit overwhelmed lately trying to get ready for a move in 5 weeks. Dealing with all of the things that go along with a move has left me with little stomach for news items like the ones below. And keep in mind, this is just from perusing a couple of sites today. This crap is depressing:

Ford sales hit by gay ad protest:

A lovely little snippet:

A conservative Christian group has seized upon Ford Motor Co.'s sponsorship of an upcoming gay pride event in Ferndale to intensify its call for a nationwide boycott of the automaker, and dealers in some parts of the country say the campaign is starting to hurt sales.

Pastors are preaching against Ford in their Sunday sermons. And some congregants have called and written dealers, saying they won't buy Ford cars until the company stops supporting organizations working to legalize gay marriage.

Hat tip: PageOneQ

Falwell vows no support for Giuliani

A lovely little snippet:

Televangelist Jerry Falwell doesn't see any Democrat making inroads with evangelical Christian voters in the next presidential election. Potential Republican candidate Rudolph Giuliani, the former New York city mayor, won't be scoring any points with Falwell, either.

"Everybody admires him. And I'll never forget the great things he did on 9/11 and following," Falwell said.

"But, of course, we have, as conservative Christians who take the Bible seriously, we have probably irreconcilable differences on life and family and that kind of thing," Falwell said Sunday on "Late Edition" on CNN.

"I'll never speak an ill word about him because he means so much to America. But, yes, you're right. I couldn't support him for president," he said.

Giuliani supports abortion rights, gay rights and gun control.

Hat tip: PageOneQ

Report: Two-thirds of Gay Students Face Harassment

A lovely little snippet:

Seventeen-year-old Jessie Liberatore has been spit on, called a dyke and even pushed down the stairs at her public school in Havre de Grace, Md.

The harassment started even before she came out in the ninth grade when there were just rumors about her sexual orientation.

"It was worse at the beginning," she said. "I’m lucky in that I’ve gone to Havre de Grace public schools my entire life. They realize I’m still the same person that they’ve known."

According to a new survey by the Gay, Lesbian & Straight Education Network, the experiences of Liberatore, who is gay, are not uncommon.

In 2005, GLSEN surveyed 1,732 lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender students between the ages of 13 and 20 from all 50 states and the District of Columbia. The survey results were released last week.

Hat tip: PageOneQ

Calvey Praises Reversal of Sexual Orientation Policy

A lovely little snippet:

OKLAHOMA CITY –(March 23, 2006)State Rep. Kevin Calvey praised the Oklahoma State Board of Education today for repealing their sexual orientation policy.

After a request from Calvey, the State Board of Education met today to make a rule change that repeals their current sexual orientation policy by modifying it to be in sync with federal and state law.

"This brings Oklahoma’s educational rules in line with federal and state law and also in line with the values shared by the large majority of Oklahomans," said Calvey, R-Del City.

Currently, federal and state laws require strong anti-discrimination policies in the areas of gender and race but do not address sexual orientation.

Calvey said the board’s new rule will protect public schools from having to allow homosexual-rights organizations to hold meetings on school grounds and will also give school boards more control over personnel decisions.

"The board’s old policy would have opened the door for our schools to become battlegrounds where activists for ‘alternative’ lifestyles would try to undermine the moral teachings of parents," said Calvey. "Now, Oklahomans won’t have to worry about that."

"I would like to thank Deborah and David Williams for bringing this issue to my attention and Mike Jestes and David Dunn of the Oklahoma Family Policy Council for raising public awareness on this issue."

Hat tip: PageOneQ

Report: Military commanders perpetrate antigay harassment

A lovely little snippet:

A new study published this month in the journal Military Psychology shows that U.S. military commanders often perpetrate or witness antigay harassment and those who are being harassed often fail to report it.

"Antigay harassment remains a daily reality for our men and women in uniform," said C. Dixon Osburn, executive director of Servicemembers Legal Defense Network, an advocacy group for gay service personnel. "Pentagon leaders have failed to implement their Anti-Harassment Action Plan and have openly acknowledged that they have no plans to more aggressively enforce measures to protect service members from antigay harassment."

Hat tip: Advocate.com:

So to recap:

· Our holy (((((bristle)))) Christian soldiers are working hard and steadfastly to take down an already embattled American Car Company because they dare to support diversity and tolerance. Sunday sermons are actually devoted to this.

· The Reverand ((((bristle)))) Jerry Falwell will not support Rudy Giuliani for president even though he thinks Mr. Giuliani is a great guy and did great things on 911. None of that matters because he supports gay rights. That cancels out all of the good things that might make him a great President.

· Two thirds of gay students are harassed in school and this statistic has not changed much from 3 years ago when the last survey was taken. A lot can be attributed to the Religious (((((bristle)))))) Right, which has fought hard to keep anti-bullying policies out of schools for fear that the gay kids might not get their daily beating or dose of hateful harassment.

· The Oklahoma State Board of Education earned high praise from State Rep. Kevin Calvey for repealing their sexual orientation policy. Now Oklahoma students can enjoy daily harassment and beatings like the rest of the country’s gay students. And as State Rep Calvey points out, Oklahoma’s educational rules are now finally in line with the values shared by the large majority of Oklahomans. How nice! Who wants to move to Oklahoma?

· And last and maybe most repulsive, reprehensible, and unforgivable of all: gay and lesbians in the military sign up to defend their country and possibly pay the ultimate price and that does not even earn them the right to be treated with dignity and respect. And most shameful of all: it is the military commanders perpetrating the antigay harassment. Wow what big brave men of honor you bullies are…

I am sick to my stomach. I am going to bed. Suddenly our move in 5 weeks sounds more appealing than reading about these horrendously horrible people. It is hard to have hope in humanity when I read about these poor excuses for human beings behaving in such evil ugly hateful ways and trying to pass it off as Christian behavior.

You Cannot Get Married and It's Gonna Cost Ya Too

On Saturday Andrew Sullivan posted an interesting statistic on his blog: the marriage rate among gays in Massachusetts is around 17%. He then went on to speculate that this may be a distorted (upward) percentage due to pent-up demand and that we will probably have to wait awhile to get a more accurate picture of the actual number of gays and lesbians who are taking advantage of the right that everyone but them enjoys.

I for one was a bit surprised by the statistic. I don’t know what I was expecting, but I truly thought the numbers would be higher. I guess I felt that what Massachusetts had done was so momentous and so groundbreaking that there would be thousands of gays and lesbians waiting at the doors of city hall at the crack of dawn on the day the law went into effect.

On Sunday one of Andrew’s readers had an interesting response to this statistic based on his own personal experience. He made the point that Gay Marriage would need to be recognized on the federal level in order for it to truly offer gays and lesbians the same rights and protections that we heterosexuals are granted when we get married. His email to Andrew:

A fairly obvious point you didn't make in your post: I don't think the comparison can ever be made about marriage rates for gay couples in Massachusetts (or any other state that grants gays the right to marry) unless there is full recognition of such marriages on the federal level. Even if I could marry under state law - the lack of federal recognition means the institution for me is still a second class affair. Important tax and other federal benefits are missing.

In my own case, my partner and I are selling my house here in California - and I will have more than $600,000 in gains. We've been together 4 years. If I gifted him half the house - he would be taxed. A couple who could have married however, would get a $500,000 flat excusion for gains under the tax code. As a single, unmarried man I get only a $250,000 exclusion - meaning that I am paying in just this one instance more than $100,000 penalty in taxes that a married couple would not have.

Very painful to think about. Less rights than any straight person - and a heavier tax burden. So much for the guarantee of equal protection under the law.

So as it stands right now, gays and lesbians are not only penalized emotionally because of whom they choose to love, but they are also punished financially. And this will never change until gay marriage is recognized on the federal level. This is wrong. This is unfair. This is un-American. This is immoral. And we need to argue just as vehemently as the other side does on why it is immoral to deny gays and lesbians the right to marry. Here are a few arguments to start with (I know there are many more):

• It is immoral to deny a whole group of Americans the right to marry because some people believe it is wrong based on their religious beliefs.
• It is immoral to penalize gays and lesbians by making them pay more taxes because we have denied them the right to get married and by extension the tax advantages that come with marriage.
• It is immoral to deny the children of gay and lesbian couples the same protections (such as child support should a union dissolve) and benefits (such as health insurance) that children of heterosexual couples automatically receive because their parents can get married.
• It is immoral for any one group of people to feel so morally superior that they feel entitled to deny rights to another group of people because of whom they choose to love.
• It is immoral to deny the country the social stability that would come with allowing gays and lesbians to marry.
• It is immoral to use God or the Bible to justify making some people lesser human beings unworthy of equal treatment and rights.

I believe Americans by and large are fair people, but we must put a human face on this issue. Stories like the one above are exactly the kind of stories Americans need to hear before they make a decision on where they stand on this issue. It is much harder to deny someone the same rights and protections you enjoy if you know that the consequences of that denial are going to be severe and unfairly punitive. It’s a whole lot easier to discriminate against a fuzzy boogieman concept like the homosexual agenda than a real live human being with hopes, dreams, goals and worries that are scarily similar to your own.